Alpha male wakes up to women ...

Aldous posts on Alvanista

Hello Alvanista!

Long time listener first time caller, love the show, despite your (shaming language) this, and your (shaming language) that, I’m really a big fan.

I’ve been “lurking” on the MRA blogs now for quite a while and I’m happy to inform you that yours is the first one I’ve ever commented on. I’ve done this for two reasons: I’ve been meaning to comment on many of the blogs for a while, and I’m also an economic liberal and generally sensible person who believes this bullshit about pulling yourself up by your bootstraps doesn’t really work when they stole your shoes and cut off your feet.

That being said I do want to stress that I believe wholeheartedly in personal responsibility and hard work, they are fundamental aspects of being a successful person, but I live in the real world, where we are not all about to inherit the family business.

I’m coming to you now from a unique perspective and one that I hope will help y’all in your myriad discussions concerning, I hope, not only men’s issues, but life issues also. I am a reformed Alpha male.

Now I know what you’re thinking…psyche, I don’t know, but let’s approach this from the angle which is that I’m telling the truth, which I am, and things will go a lot smoother…psyche.

Good times, psyche, you could probably date me by that expression.

I’m 30 years old. In my lifetime I’ve slept with between 80-100 women (no hookers obviously), hooked up with possibly 500 though that could be an underestimate, and have done things to women within hours of meeting them that many in the MRA community will most likely have to keep in the spank bank for the rest of their lives. These are the facts, am I proud of this, no comment, I don’t believe in assigning value judgments to the things that happen to me, or the things that I’ve done, as these can be illusions, that beautiful girl you scored with could give you herpes, that DUI could help you get control of your life and lead you to new heights?

I’ve literally had just about every experience in relation to women you could imagine, been the beta, been the alpha, the omega, the man flavored pork product, the son, the brother, all of it, I’d say I’ve been a lucky man but I won’t say that, I’ll only say I’m an experienced man.

When I say that I’m a reformed Alpha what I mean is that I was gifted, or cursed, with an extraordinary genetic package which combined with extraordinary opportunity resulted, for a time, in a my being a daisy cutter dropped into a group of willing, possibly naive, “feminist” women. And for a long time I rode that shock wave, convinced that my success with women was an indicator of my inherent worth, an indicator that surely I could never fail at life because, duh, no guy that’s successful with women is unsuccessful in life, right, duh?

Like Icarus, I flew too close to the sun, and came crashing down to earth a broken man…a beta man. My confidence had left me, I gained weight, became scared, sought approval like a bulldog done bad. It took me seven lean years to get back to par and I’m more solidly a man because of it. What happens to a man that touches the sun?

If he lives, he’s been burned, but he’s better for it and he’ll make sure to keep his distance the next time.

What lead me to the MRA/MGTOW community was a combination of two crazy women, not an oxymoron because some of them, some, are perfectly sane. An LTR who I realized didn’t love me so much as love the idea of being married into my family, and a sister, a really bright formerly beautiful sister, who has gone so far off the rails of sanity with her “feminism” that I now think she’s a crazy person and I hate to say it, I no longer give a shit about, which is good because in all of her self righteousness she forgot that it was her that was responsible for her actions and is likely to be dead soon from her alcoholism and generally toxic attitude, she’s already had cancer at 33, my grandparents are both 90 and deliver, not get, meals on wheels.

Like a man I’d always assumed it was my fault, that I was doing something wrong, that anything that happened to me involving women was an entirely self inflicted wound, that women were perfect, that they were all like my mother, and incapable, constitutionally, of doing any wrong.

The truth is, that women have become nightmares, and men, in their perennial effort to please women, have let their dreams become reality. I believe that a strong majority of men are inherently kind, just, and believe there is a purpose and a reason for our existence on this gathering of stardust known as earth, that men, in general, believe in ideals, and want people to be happy. Thus we were betrayed.

We showed weakness and were exploited, it happens all the time, but has likely never happened in such a collective manner in the course of human history.

It is a sad day when I wake up and realize all of my assumptions, all of those intense feelings, were lies, it is a happy day when I wake up and realize I am free, I am not a victim, and entirely responsible for my own well being…I only have to let go of the sad day I woke up to.

Anyway, enough platitudes, time to hit the nitty gritty. I abhor racism but I also realize it is a part of the ongoing battle any intelligent person has between their emotions and their intellect. Intellectually, racism is a reprehensible lizard brain spit back to an unenlightened era, emotionally I went to public schools and was terrorized by young, fatherless, emotionally unstable black males in my youth…and boy howdy, it’s hard to get rid of your emotions. It’s natural, and entirely logical, to fear that which you do not understand, and fear is an emotion, which, to a certain degree cannot be helped, but that doesn’t get one off the hook, the greatest aspiration a man can have is to conquer his emotions, to be able to react to any situation dispassionately is the true test of a man, to be not influenced by lust nor fear nor avarice nor poverty, upon that, you will be a man my friend.

So overall, the MRA community should adamantly reject racism but realize that some who are racist have visceral emotional reasons for being so, and should be counseled and offered understanding because of said affliction. If they’re just narrow minded assholes cut em off, period, who needs em?

Anyway, I hope y’all enjoyed my convoluted introduction, I hope to post further. A.